Start at the beginning

I couldn’t get out of bed today. My stomach kept grinding. My head filled with negativity. Why the hell am I here?  What’s my purpose?

For some reason I went scrolling through pictures. What made me happy on Instagram?  Then I realized behind some of those  smiles there were tears. I don’t want to repeat it. Ya I had good experiences. I don’t want to do what I did because it puts me in a miserable place.

So what do I do now?  I open my mind to new possibilities. I choose to be the best me no matter what insane butt muncher did to me a year ago.

I will wake tomorrow and try to fight through the tears to be better. I don’t know what the hell I’m doing. Tomorrow I may trip and let the shit of the past get the best of me. However sometimes ya just have to start at the beginning. The end could be a new beautiful beginning of something beyond my imagination.

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