Why Am I here….

I reconnected with my friend Tracy yesterday. She asked how the job search was going. I said a couple offers but not the right fit. I had to type it’s been 5 months. 5 months. FIVE. Almost half a year!  6 months is what “they” say it takes to find a job but it feels too long,  doesn’t it?

I try to turn it into a positive,  you had to sit out for these months because you had a lesson to learn or the perfect job will come in another week or month.  Had you been at a place where you were miserable you wouldn’t have seen the opportunity. There has to be something,  I tell myself as a tear slides down my face.

I have never been off work this long since I was 15.  I worked my way through high school,  saving $5,000. I worked 3 jobs in college and earned a 3.5 GPA. So there has to be a positive reason this happened. There. Has. To. Be.


Gods plan or something. I just have to “take the first step before I see the whole staircase” as Martin Luther King said. Just breathe in and out and have the courage to move forward. The thoughts creep in “what if I’m walking the wrong way, what if I never get past the ‘brick wall’ I feel like is in front of me. There just has to be a good reason. There just has to be.  Right?





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